Defying Gravity

Wicked was absolutely amazing!! I knew a lot of the music because I have the soundtrack but actually seeing what was happening during this or that song was so great. We were about 7 rows from the stage so it was like being part of the show. The wizard was played by Richard Cline, who is Larry from 3's Company, and he did a great job. The girl playing Glinda was delightfully ditzy. And the girl playing Elphaba had the perfect blend of vulnerability and strength. The costuming was amazing as were the sets. I want to see it again...lol.

Watching it though makes me long for the theatre. Broadway was my dream all through high school, but life would take me in another direction. Now though when I see a show or go to a theatre I just long to be a piece of it. I want the lights and the sets and the costumes and the memorization and the dancing and the constant rehearsals and the applause. I miss it all so much. I guess the easy answer would be to get involved in community theatre again. I just haven't done it in so long I am afraid it just won't be the same and for a while I just didn't have the self esteem for auditions, but I can feel me coming back. Maybe soon.

Along those lines I have now officially lost 17 pounds...which means I am more than halfway to my first goal. I am honestly so proud of me for doing so well and continuing to work and lose. I feel more in control of my body than I have in a very long time. This is definitely a good thing.

I am still trying to work out the details of my going to school. I think I mentioned that I found out that I can get almost no financial aid because I made too much last year, sigh. So I am backing up and regrouping. I have a few options but I just can't decide what is the best way to go. I can stay with my current job and try to get tuition reimbursement while going part time and working full time. This is a definite option, but there are a lot of big changes and such coming soon at work, so I am not sure if I will still want to be there and I don't want to get stuck. I can get more student loans that are non government and get a part time job while going to school full time, but it's going to make finances tight for Seth and I. I just can't decide what is going to be the best option. And it's making me crazy.

 I keep dreaming about school, but since I never went to college in my dreams I am an adult in high school, or last night middle school. The schools are always really messed up and have major issues like the staircase crumbles beneath my feet or just isn't there. It's truly strange and they are flipping me out.